50 Epic Sarcastic Quotes About Friendship

Sarcasm is a way of communication between friends. It strengthens bonds and improves friendships over time.

However, everything has limits, and so has sarcasm. If you say sarcastic quotes about friendship, do it to a limit while ensuring the other person’s feelings won’t hurt.

Okay! Here, I’ve collected some of the best sarcastic friendship quotes that will make you laugh and drive you to share with your friends.

The Funny Sarcastic Quotes About Friendship

  1. “Knowledge cannot replace friendship. I’d rather be an idiot than lose you.” — Patrick
  2. “Love is blind; friendship tries not to notice.” — Otto von Bismarck
  3.  “I’m not saying I hate you, what I’m saying is that you are literally the Monday of my life.” ~ Anonymous
  4. “I am busy right now, can I ignore you some other time?~ Anonymous
  5.  “Find your patience before I lose mine.” ~ Anonymous
  6. “It’s okay if you don’t like me. Not everyone has good taste.” ~ Anonymous
  7. “I’m sorry, while you were talking, I was trying to figure out where the hell you got the idea I cared.” ~ Anonymous
  8. “No, you don’t have to repeat yourself. I was ignoring you the first time.” ~ Anonymous
  9. “I don’t have the energy to pretend to like you today.” ~ Anonymous
  10. “I’m sorry I hurt your feelings when I called you stupid. I really thought you already knew.” ~ Anonymous
  11. “Friendship is not possible between two women, one of whom is very well dressed.” — Laurie Colwin.
  12. “People say that laughter is the best medicine… your face must be curing the world.” ~ Anonymous
  13. “Well, at least your mom thinks you’re pretty.” ~ Anonymous
  14. “Sometimes, I need what only you can provide: your absence.” – Ashleigh Brilliant
  15. “You’d be in good shape… if you ran as much as your mouth.” ~ Anonymous
  16. “Zombies eat brains. You’re safe.” ~ Anonymous
  17. “My silence doesn’t mean I agree with you. It’s just that your level of ignorance has rendered me speechless.” ~ Anonymous
  18. “You’re everything I want in someone I don’t want anymore.” ~ Anonymous
  19. “Shut your mouth when you’re talking to me.” ~ Anonymous
  20. “Whenever I see you, I feel bad for your dog.” ~ Anonymous
  21. “A good friend will always stab you in the front.” — Oscar Wilde
  22. “If ignorance is bliss, you must be the happiest person on this planet.” ~ Anonymous
  23. “When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.” Sacha Guitry
  24. “No, no, no. I’m not insulting you. I’m just describing you.” ~ Anonymous
  25. “Your fervent, misguided sense of entitlement is stunning.” ~ Anonymous
  26.  “Someday, you’ll go far. I hope you stay there.” ~ Anonymous
  27. “I have neither the time nor the crayons to explain this to you.” ~ Anonymous
  28. “My alone time is sometimes for your safety.” ~ Anonymous
  29. “You’re not that lucky, and I’m not that desperate!” Anonymous
  30. “If you’ve never met the devil on the road of life, it’s because you’re both heading in the same direction.” Anonymous
  31. “You suck. You should fix that.” ~ Anonymous
  32. “Not a single one of my multiple personalities like you.” ~ Anonymous
  33. “There’s someone for everyone, and that person for you is a psychiatrist.” ~ Anonymous
  34. “They say ignorance is bliss, but I find yours rather disturbing.” ~ Anonymous
  35. “You can be whatever you want; however, in your case, you should probably aim low.” – Anonymous
  36. Keep rolling your eyes. Maybe you’ll find a brain back there.” ~ Anonymous
  37. “I found your nose. It was in my business.” ~ Anonymous
  38.  “Life is full of disappointments, and I just added you to the list.” ~ Anonymous
  39. Real friends don’t get offended when you insult them. They smile and call you something even more offensive. ~ Anonymous
  40. “I’d agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong.” ~ Anonymous
  41. “If ignorance is bliss, you must be the happiest person on this planet.” ~ Anonymous
  42. “I’m not saying I hate you; what I’m saying is that you are literally the Monday of my life.” ~ Anonymous
  43. “I’ll try being nicer if you try being smarter.” ~ Anonymous
  44. “Sorry… to have met you.” ~ Anonymous
  45. “Someday, you’ll go far. I hope you stay there.” ~ Anonymous
  46. “I can explain it to you, but I can’t understand it for you.” ~ Anonymous
  47. “My girlfriend is always stealing my t-shirts and sweaters… But if I take one of her dresses, suddenly, “we need to talk”. ~ Anonymous
  48. “I don’t like to commit myself about heaven and hell — you see, I have friends in both places.” — Mark Twain
  49.  “Friendship is like peeing in your pants. Everyone can see it, but only you can feel a warm feeling inside.” ~ Anonymous
  50. “We’ve been friends for so long I can’t remember which one of us is the bad influence.” ~ Anonymous
  51. “Only your real friends will tell you when your face is dirty.” — Sicilian Proverb

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